As Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is becoming more prevalent, it is so important to know how to talk about autism and inclusion with our children. In my opinion, it’s never too early to start.
This post was created by Marra Robert, OTD, OTRL and contains affiliate links
Hi! My name is Marra and I’m a mama and a pediatric occupational therapist who has years of experience working with children with autism and helping their parents navigate the ups and downs of child development.
I loved being a support person for parents learning about autism, sensory processing, and their child’s individual needs.
Our world is becoming more and more neurodiverse, and as parents, most of us want to raise compassionate, loving children who accept others for who they are and grow up to be adults who want to make the world a better place.
As Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is becoming more prevalent, it is so important to know how to talk about autism and other disabilities as well as inclusion with our children. In my opinion, it’s never too early to start.
how to talk about autism: starting the conversation with your kid
Most of you are probably already aware of this. However, you might be at a loss of how even to start these conversations with your kids and know exactly how to talk about autism with them.
Topics such as autism, disability, social justice, and inclusion can be overwhelming, difficult, or even a little intimidating for us to discuss with our children.
Some of you may have questions such as how do I start this conversation and how to talk about autism and disabilities? What do I say? What if I say the wrong thing? What if my child asks a question I don’t know the answer to?
Well parents, feel free to take all the pressure off of yourselves. I have a great tool for you to use. Books! Books are such an incredible way to start conversations about many challenging topics with your children.
Books already have the “what do I say?” question taken care of for you. There are some amazing books out there that do a wonderful job discussing topics and are great conversation starters.
HOW TO TALK ABOUT AUTISM AND DISABILITIES WITH YOUR KIDS
This Is Me! I am who I'm meant to be!:
This is Me! I Am Who I’m Meant to Be by Amy Pflueger is a book about a boy named Able who helps readers understand what some of the common characteristics of autism are like through his eyes. Able does a great job of showing everyone how autism is a SUPERPOWER!
Every Child Is Different:
Every Child is Different by Luna James is a book about kindness, diversity, equality, and justice. It was written for children ages 2-5 years old.
This book talks about how boring life would be if we were all the same. It also explains how it’s so important to not only be kind to others but to stand up for those who are being bullied or mistreated.
You Are Enough: A Book About Inclusion
You are Enough by Margaret O’Hair, Sofia Sanches, and Sofia Cordoso. Sofia Sanchez is a 14-year-old model, actress, and advocate for Down Syndrome. She co-authored this book when she was 11 years old.
She does a beautiful job reminding readers of the importance of being confident in who you are and embracing your differences. The kids in this book all have unique backgrounds and abilities. Sofia sends the powerful message that we all belong.
Wonder
“Wonder” by R.J. Palacio tells the story of August Pullman, a boy with facial differences who enters mainstream school for the first time.
This book beautifully illustrates the challenges and triumphs of living with a visible disability and the importance of kindness. It’s a heartfelt narrative that encourages readers to look beyond appearances and appreciate everyone’s unique qualities.
El Deafo
“El Deafo” by Cece Bell is a graphic novel based on the author’s own experiences with hearing loss. The story follows Cece, who feels like an outsider because of her hearing aid.
However, she eventually embraces her device as a superpower. This charming, humorous book provides insight into the daily experiences of someone with hearing loss and emphasizes the value of self-acceptance.
A friend for henry
“A Friend for Henry,” by Jenn Bailey is about a boy on the autism spectrum, searches for a friend in his classroom.
This touching story explores the nuances of social interactions from Henry’s perspective, making it a great tool for teaching empathy. The illustrations are gentle and inviting, enhancing the book’s appeal to young readers.
Out of My Mind
“Out of my mind” by Sharon M. Draper.This powerful novel centers on Melody, a girl with cerebral palsy who cannot speak or walk. Despite her physical limitations,
Melody has a brilliant mind and a resilient spirit. “Out of My Mind” is a compelling narrative that challenges stereotypes and highlights the importance of seeing beyond disabilities.
The Girl Who Thought in Pictures: The Story of Dr. Temple Grandin
“The girl who thought in pictures” by Julia Finley. This biographical picture book introduces young readers to Dr. Temple Grandin, an autistic scientist and animal behaviorist.
The rhyming text and vibrant illustrations make Grandin’s story accessible and engaging, inspiring children to celebrate their differences and pursue their passions.
We're All Wonders
“We’re all wonders” by R.J. Palacio. A companion to “Wonder,” this picture book simplifies August Pullman’s story for younger readers.
Through delightful illustrations and simple text, “We’re All Wonders” delivers a powerful message about empathy and acceptance, encouraging children to recognize the wonder in everyone.
All the Way to the Top: How One Girl’s Fight for Americans with Disabilities Changed Everything
“All the way to the top” by Annette Bay Pimentel. This book tells the true story of Jennifer Keelan-Chaffins, who participated in the Capitol Crawl to advocate for the Americans with Disabilities Act.
The narrative is both inspiring and educational, showing children how activism and perseverance can lead to significant change.
My Brother Charlie
Written by Holly Robinson Peete and her daughter, this book is about a young girl named Callie and her twin brother Charlie, who has autism.
The story highlights the siblings’ bond and the unique challenges and strengths that come with Charlie’s condition. It’s a heartfelt tale that promotes understanding and acceptance.
The Reason I Jump
Though originally written for older children and teens, “The Reason I Jump” offers profound insights into the mind of a 13-year-old boy with autism.
Naoki Higashida’s honest and articulate responses to common questions about autism provide readers with a deeper understanding of the condition.
Not So Different: What You Really Want to Ask About Having a Disability
This non-fiction picture book features Shane Burcaw, who has spinal muscular atrophy, addressing questions kids might have about disabilities. His candid, humorous answers paired with engaging photographs make this book an excellent resource for fostering open conversations about disabilities.
After you have read one of these books with your children, stay open to having a conversation to talk about autism and disabilities. Maybe ask them their thoughts. You might get asked a question you might not know the answer to. The good news is that’s okay!
Did you know that saying “I don’t know” is a perfectly wonderful answer to a question your child may ask?
As parents, we think we have to know everything, teach our children about the world, and have everything figured out all the time. Our children look to us as if we have all of the answers but that’s not what they need. They just need a safe space to ask questions and to be heard.
Stay curious! What would happen if your child asked you a question you didn’t know the answer to and your reply was something along the lines of “I don’t know, but that is such a great question” and then “What if we try to figure out the answer together”
Then you’ve sparked curiosity in your child and you can talk about how you might go about finding the answer together. Maybe you go get more books at the library?
Maybe you talk to a friend who might know more about the topic? Maybe you look up some information online together (in a safe, supervised way).
Maybe your child has great ideas about how you can find the answer. You can turn an overwhelming topic into an adventure to learn more that you can go on together.
We need to worry less about having all the right answers for our children and knowing exactly what to say all the time. I believe it’s more important to model curiosity and to teach them that learning doesn’t stop when they finish school.
By teaching our children to stay open and curious, I know we can change our culture to be more inclusive, aware, accepting, and accommodating of how neurodiverse we truly are.